You will go the extra mile for others reasons, perhaps for the psychic income—that is, the positive feedback or appreciation we all value. However, on any given day, even if I perform at the top of my game, likely I will not get much feedback from those I serve most directly. Half my clients are non-verbal, hard of hearing or remembering. If I do have a meaningful interaction one week, it is likely to be forgotten by the next. “Nothing personal,” I remind myself, when my clientele are dementia patients. Your situation will be different: perhaps you need and get regular feedback from a boss or valued client. But extrinsic motivation gets one only so far in a chosen career.
If not for money, psychic income, or enduring relationships with clients, could our personality traits be what draw us to our respective professions?
Conversely, much of what chaplaincy entails runs counter to these ingrained traits. Other traits—being a good listener first, being more feeler than thinker, being a careful observer, someone prone to simply “be” rather than always “doing”—that would suit and strengthen any chaplain’s ministry. Also, a certain amount of conformity (to the health care system), aversion to risk or heroics, a modest & quiet demeanor, acquiescence (to fate and human weakness) are required to succeed in this profession. Likewise, in your chosen field, your personality will serve to both hinder and advance your success.
I serve as a hospice worker, in part, because I have always been committed to doing good and doing right for the little guy no matter what the odds. The longer the odds and more difficult the task, the greater the joy if I’m successful. Yet the odds of “recovery” for a hospice patient are, by definition, nil. Hospice patients come to us for palliative or comfort care, not a medical cure. Hospice believes that the end of life is not a medical event to be averted, but a human experience to be embraced. Hospice care brings comfort, self-respect, and peace to people in the final year of life.
Purpose defines success. The more specific and clear the purpose, the more motivated, creative and successful we’ll be. Conversely, if unclear, we can never do enough and never hear a definitive “well done.” In hospice work, we strive for win-win solutions, so that our patients in the last year of their life are granted their last wishes and a lasting legacy. By faith in Christ, I know that death does not win. Rather, only after death are we fully alive and victorious.
Some families cannot be there in the end for their loved one, and count on hospice workers (aides, nurse, social worker, music therapists, chaplain) to assist with that last leg of the journey across the finish line. Training volunteers for a hospice vigil, much as my mother used to do, are another way that the hospice movement helps. My ever-compassionate mother did this for 25 others before she too died in a hospice setting, with me at her bedside.
I work in hospice because this movement is much bigger than me and represents a most noble profession and enduring cause. I am a hospice worker because there is no greater satisfaction than helping those who cannot help themselves to enjoy a better life, a good death, and a future hope. I help others to finish well, leaving loved ones content in the face of unimaginable physical pain, emotional loss, and spiritual challenges.
I used this space, selfishly, to process what I do and why. Elsewhere, as in the Chamber newsletter, I interview other people as to what they do and why. If you want to be one of those interviewees, and share what drives you, please connect with me.